The love between two people should be filled with happiness and last forever. But two people don’t always do what they should and the relationship becomes toxic. You can tell if you are in a toxic relationship by looking at certain signs.
These are signs of a toxic relationship
According to the Encyclopedia of Psychology and Education Online, the term “toxic relationship” refers to a partnership that costs more than it gives and in which it is the partner’s behavior that “poisons” the relationship, that is, it is harmful.
(Stangl, W. (2022). Keyword: “Toxic Relationship – Online Dictionary of Psychology and Education’. Online encyclopedia of psychology and teaching methods.)
# static argument
There are disagreements in every relationship – of course. But what if you are constantly fighting your way through conflicts and may only blame the other person? The many arguments you keep hoping after that things will get better is a clear sign of an unhealthy relationship. Because despite the constant problems, you can’t stay away from each other, even if you don’t seem to get along and hurt each other because of the many arguments. Even if you have children, you should reconsider this point, because children also feel it when their parents stop getting along with each other.
Constant control and excessive jealousy part of your relationship? Then you should seriously reconsider this. A little bit of jealousy is OK, but if you have to justify yourself on every date you spend with friends and have to call them or Whatsapp every ten minutes to find out where you are, it’s by no means healthy. Over time it becomes intimidating and makes you do something less and less afraid of conflict. Your partner feels that you are allowing this to happen to you and that the “ownership relationship” is developing more and more and more and more jealousy. This is a clear sign of a toxic relationship.
# Everything about each other
Compromise is a good thing in a relationship because it is about you and your children if you have any. But if it’s only about the other person and you always put your own needs and the needs of your children behind you, you will gradually live in an unhealthy relationship. You will not be happy in the long run because you cannot realize yourself, but you must make it possible in this partnership. Life is about growth and also about independence. Even if you are in a relationship, you are still a single person with your own desires and dreams.
# Always Caution
Should you constantly watch what and how you say something because you are afraid of argument? Would you rather keep your opinion to yourself because you fear the reaction? Do your children always worry that their thoughts will cause rejection or anger and that they will back down from their problems? Then you have to question this relationship. Partnership thrives on the fact that two people can tell each other what they think (politely and without provocation). If you are so afraid of your partner’s reaction that you remain silent all the time and come close to walking on eggshells at home, then you are clearly in a toxic relationship, because fear should never rule the relationship.
There are relationships in which one fears being alone and believes that one cannot handle it alone. Are you staying with your partner because they always tell you that you can’t live your life alone? Then reconsider this relationship! No one should stay with the other person because they don’t want to be alone.
Of course, there are also relationships in which financial dependency plays a role – sometimes kids do, of course, which is why we stay together. In the first case, you should know more: is there financial aid that can comfort you? Can the family help or is a job change possible? When it comes to children: How does your partner act towards your children? Once a child’s safety is at risk, it’s no longer just about you. In either case mentioned, you should contact a counseling center such as ProFamilia. This also applies to violence in a relationship!
violence in a relationship
A toxic relationship sometimes also consists of one partner’s use of violence. This behavior often results from some of the points mentioned above and is punishable by law. If you or your children experience violence in the relationship, you must end the partnership and report it. Don’t let them tell you that you won’t be able to do without him/her, because you’d rather be alone than get abused – no doubt! In addition to informing the police and women’s shelters, there are also counseling centers here that you can contact and visit:
Please do not hesitate to end this relationship even if you are afraid. Violence in a relationship shouldn’t happen and will happen again and again as long as you don’t resist and end the partnership immediately.
Do you treat your partner with respect?
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